Skip The Sticky Trap of Bad Relationships

December 18, 2022 Speaker: Tara Detiveaux Series: Home Alone

Topic: Relationships Scripture: 1 Peter 5:6– :11

Skip The Sticky Trap of Bad Relationships

Video of Robber Following Harry

Sometimes the enemy will have us home alone not doing the work and purposes that God has for us, or we will lean into comparison, or we will stay trapped in our past rather than using it to allow God’s healing work in our lives, and I think of one more it would be the trap of relationships.

Now clearly relationships are not bad in and of themselves.  The lord clearly commands that we are to love God with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength but also to love our neighbor.  To love our neighbor requires relationship.

We have families.

We have marriages.

We have churches.

All built on relationship.  Relationship with one another is how we grow…

Proverbs 27:17  “Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another.”

Relationships are like a sticky trap, for the good and for the bad. 

Retailers often use the fact that sticky traps work on both mice and rats as a selling point. And it's true, both mice and rats can get stuck to a sticky trap. However, it's important to consider why that's the case. Both rats and mice can be caught by sticky traps because of how undiscriminating glue is.

Wow.

That’s a statement.  No matter how big or small the rodent is, it can be caught because the glue is undiscriminating and does what it is supposed to do, stick.

So it doesn’t matter if it’s the biggest rat or the tiniest of mice, it will do the job it is supposed to do. Stick.  And relationships are the same, it doesn’t matter if your have loved the Lord for 30 years and walked faithfully with him or you have know Jesus for three weeks.

Relationships stick to us. 

It’s the design of them. 

God created us to be in relationship with Him. Our goal is to stick with him.

God created us to be in relationship with others.

They become a huge part of who we are and who we will become.

There's a saying that goes "show me your friends and I can tell you who you are".

“Show me your friends, and I will show you your future.”

“Who are your friends, you become who you hang with.”

And in a good relationship, healthy relationships, that is a good thing. 

Maybe someone is discipling you, we encourage that.  Sit under someone and learn, ask advice, live in community together, show up and be a part of brothers and sisters learning the word of God together. 

That’s what want in our friendships, in our marriages, in our church.

But that’s not the trap.

The trap is when we continue in and get stuck in unhealthy, unbiblical, and terrible relationships!

And it’s like the sticky glue of our lives, and we struggle to get out.

And you want to be free, you know you need to be free, the trick is truly getting free.

Ex. Story of your dad getting out of unhealthy relationships…

Is the relationship you are in a sticky trap?

If you remember our theme verse

1 Peter 5:6-11

Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for youBe sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. Resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same kinds of suffering are being experienced by your brotherhood throughout the world. 10 And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you. 11 To him be the dominion forever and ever. Amen.

How do you resist bad relationships and stand firm in your faith?

  1. Does that Relationship lead you closer to Christ and make you better?

 

2 Corinthians 6:14-14 Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness? 15 What accord has Christ with Belial?[b] Or what portion does a believer share with an unbeliever? 16 What agreement has the temple of God with idols? For we are the temple of the living God

Dating, friendships, partnerships, community….who are the people that define you?

  1. Are you compromising you beliefs and values to be in that Relationship?

So many friendships require us to change who we are.  Many friendships require us to change what we believe.  The #1 way that I have seen people fall away from their relationship with the Lord?...their relationship with other people.

You go to to church, well I’ll go to church. 

You continue in the faith, I’ll continue in the faith.

You talk bad about someone, I’ll talk bad about someone.

You lead me into sin and temptation, yes lead me there.

And it sticks, its so sticky.

You have to purpose to walk out of them.

Ex. Walking out of relationships at HJH and the teacher’s lounge

 

  1. Pray that God would remove any bad relationships from your life.

1 Corinthians 15:33  “Do not be misled:  Bad Company corrupts good character.

There are just gonna be times in your life where you are going to have to pray (even if you don’t mean it) God would you remove any bad relationship from life that are not leading me into the plans and purposes that you have for me.

While dating.  Pray it.

While finding friends.  Pray it.

At the workplace.  Pray it.

In your family.  Pray it.

You can’t or don’t always know sheep from wolves.  But you know who does, the good shepherd.  And at times there will be wolves in sheep clothing setting up traps for you, and you better start praying to the Good Shepperd to remove the wolves from your life.

 

  1. Ask for Accountability.

And then ask people around you! This is pivotal because most of the time in any relationship, you can’t see the destruction or harm that it as causing as well as someone who loves and cares for you and desires for you to walk out the plans and purpose of God in your life.

You see: We’re in Love.

You see:  But we have been best friends forever.

You see:  But I don’t have anyone else in the work place who understands me.

You see: But we like the same things and laugh at the same jokes.

Here is what your accountability sees, a different level.  So allow them to speak into your life.

And avoid the sticky trap that is bad relationships.

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